I don't want to go home. I don't want to go home. Minime, don't cry.. not worth it to cry over such useless and unreasonable things.. I DON'T WANT TO GO HOME..

Sin 1-Greed

I swore to myself that after exam, i will go for a 5km run every morning. However, mission failed. Not only did i not exerciese, I bought Sausage Mc Girdle this morning from McDonalds.. MY GOD.. it's yumilicious, my favourite pancake, sausage patty and egg all in one.. Though i find it pretty expensive.. at almost $6.. it was worth it.. a once in a while treat shouldnt do much harm to my pocket.. ha ha.. ate it layer by layer, licking my hand each time.. ha ha..

Anyway, bought an abercrombie t-shirt (100% authentic) from sgspree yesterday.. woo hoo.. my first time spreeing and it was fun.. i hope it doesn't become an addiction or else i will be dead broke.

Ok.. that's all for now, going back to watch Happiness (K-drama)

Tata, minime rocks

Update: just ran 6km and was shaking the hula hoop for 10 plus minutes.. i want to tone my body

Happiness

Today, i just realise something that is so very hard to get.. and that is HAPPINESS. Being happy on the surface is a different matter from being truly happy in your heart. Very often, i find it difficult to be happy. It's only when i watch those silly romantic comedies and Korean dramas that allow me to break into these occassional smiles.

Living in a family where there is someone experiencing depression is an extremely difficult thing. You feel anger, helplessness and frustration when seeing that person shaking her head (as if she has eaten ecstasy pills). You may say that i am immature, but i just cant understand why does she let herself spiral downwards. Her self-centredness and selfishness as created lots of unhappiness in this house. Worst of all, she always tries to make up after throwing her fits, or behaving irrationally, like a mad woman.

Today, she got into deep shit again.. lost her hp for almost two weeks and didnt realise it (realised it but thought she misplaced it). When i told her to look for her phone, she cant be bothered. Guess what "complacency" or "self-denial" leads to -- $1000 phone bill chalked up by some unkown stranger who has picked up her phone. All these could have been avoided if she was diligent enough - what about her and her policy of remebering to be alert. With her shaking her head and looking dazed, everyone who looks at her would evidently conclude that she is a mentally unsound person and an easy target.

With these happening all around me, it makes it difficult for me to place trust in her again. Why cant she be like any other normal person. I am not being greedy, but just yearn for what normal people has..

It's tough really tough, and despite the toughgoings, my dad has been the one trying to convince us to respect her..

For that, and the past 20 years of shit that he has to experience from her, I truly respect and admire my dad, as any other ordinary man would have given her a tight-slap and divorced her.

Happiness.. where can it be found...

For me, only when i am alone watching Korean drams.. Isnt that sad